There are NO bad Patent Examiners: The unofficial guide to working with the "good" ones

Here is the basic deal: You tell the U.S. government (i.e. the United States Patent and Trademark Office; USPTO) how to make and use your invention and the U.S. government grants you exclusive, legal rights (i.e. “protection”) for that invention. But how much protection will you get? A patent examiner will decide.Most patent examiners are terrific, but just like any other profession the actual skill and genuine helpfulness varies along a scale. If we set that scale from GOOD at one end, to SUPER-FANTASTIC at the other end, then we can agree that, according to our scale, most patent examiners are TERRIFIC and that there are no BAD patent examiners. However, in contrast to other situations, where you might get to pick your doctor, your accountant, your kid's math teacher, or your sailboat broker, you will not get to pick your patent examiner, so you will need to work with the one assigned to your application.So, this unofficial, unsanctioned, unendorsed, unsponsored guide was written as a practical and as-humorous-as-a-tome-on-patent-examination-can-be handbook to help inventors (and their patent attorneys) navigate the frequently-frustrating and way-too-intricate process of obtaining a patent for an invention. This guide offers NO legal advice whatsoever – seriously: none, zip, nada, zero, nil... the author is NOT a lawyer, so absolutely nothing written herein (no matter how “lawyer-y” it may sound) can be construed as legal advice under any circumstance, or for any reason, in any context, at all ... ever; no matter how advice-like it may sound...Spoiler Alert: Patent Attorneys vary on the same scale - but most inventors can pick their attorney ... so educate yourself and choose wisely! Read more